How to tell my friend her boyfriend isn’t invited to my wedding?
I just want to add a quick trigger warning for anyone who may need it. I’m going to be discussing stalking in this post. Please don’t read if it would be upsetting for you.
My fiance and I are having about 100 guests at our reception following our private ceremony. It’s a pretty casual party, and not crazy expensive, so there’s room for me to give my friends a plus one. I’m running into an issue with one particular friend though. She and I have been friends for over a decade, but I’m not close to her boyfriend at all. He lives about an hour away so I’ve only met him once. They’ve been together for about a year and a half now, but in the early stages of their relationship, they hit a “bump” to put it VERY lightly.
She found out that he had not one, but TWO orders of protection against him from two different women. They were both girls that he had dated in the past. He stalked both of them, and clearly had a dangerous obsession with them. She cut things off with him after finding this out. My mom had asked how things were going with the guy she was seeing, and I told her what happened. (This wasn’t a secret so I didn’t tell my mom anything she didn’t want her to know)
After a while, he reached back out and somehow convinced her that he’s changed. I voiced my opinion that I was concerned for her safety, but of course I can’t control what she does. They’ve been together since then. I met him once before she found out about the orders of protection, but I don’t feel comfortable being around someone like that, so I avoid him.
My mom is contributing a lot of money to the wedding, and she has not made any demands on who’s getting invited or anything like that. She has not been a momzilla at all. The only thing she’s said is he is absolutely not allowed to attend the wedding. Honestly I have to agree with her. I don’t feel comfortable with him being around, especially on such an important occasion. I just don’t know how to approach this with her. I don’t want to hurt her feelings, but I really don’t want him there. How should I handle this?