I broke no contact and feel awful about it

Basically the title.

She said we’d get back together no matter how long it took, but after saying I had something important to say she blocked me as if I never existed.

It’s been a year since then.

I know I shouldn’t have, and I prefaced that in the letter/message but I did say it would be the last time I contacted her. I think there’s a part of my brain that just wants closure with the whole “wait for me” thing. I know she doesn’t owe me that, and I didn’t bring it up but it’s just been really hard recently. I’ll probably delete it as I continue to regret my decision but yeah that’s everything