How in touch are you with your feminine / masculine side?

Do you try to control it / how much of a role do you allow it to play in your life? Do you view it the same / in a similar way as you'd do emotions? Would you think of it as a hindrance? Do you think you'd be better off without it?

I'm quite curious how / whether some attributes of being an INTJ (could or do) warp our experience with femininity / masculinity. Especially interested in what women have to say as, biologically speaking, I believe they'd be more prone to feel / be emotional. Curious to see how that and being an INTJ mould together.

I know despite having a tight grip on my emotions, I personally still feel a strong urge to protect (Even though I'm not in a relationship) It is depressing at times. It'd slip into my dreams, suggesting that there's something else out there that I desire. My brain, on the other hand, concludes that it is more effort than is worth. It's the logical conclusion (from my perspective - I realise and respect that not everyone is going to share this view) Yet for some reason - despite the massive control I have over my emotions; I feel like I have a vulnerability that is exposed, which I can not get under control.

Is it perhaps because it's ingrained on a deeper level? Because it's a basic foundation of who we are?