Text from my lifelong best friend.

"Idk learn to have the capacity to see outside of yourself for once maybe then you'd be able to hold onto a friendship"

That was over a year ago, she's also told our mutual friends bad things about me and since none of them want to talk to me now I don't know what has been said about me. It's been a year but I can't get over it because I have no friends now and I've always struggled making new friends.

I did everything with her. Supported her through everything growing up together, listened whenever she needed me, I thought I was so empathetic and kind. She has bipolar disorder and tends to cut off friends because she gets paranoid they've stabbed her in the back, but I can't believe she would think of me like that. It hurts so much that someone I love thinks I'm a bad or selfish person.

I'm still so hurt about it I regularly cry thinking about this lost friendship. I really believe that throughout our friendship I always saw "outside myself" as I would sacrafice a lot to be there for her when she needed me. She'd call me in crisis in the middle of the night etc. and I left my phone volume on 24/7 so I could pick up her calls. She still texts my mum, she even told my mum that my family was "like a second family to her"....Yeah obviously, because I welcomed her into my home and family when her family was crumbling when we were kids.

Do any of you also struggle with friendships? What might I have done in adhd la-la-land that made her think I don't care?

*edit, she said and did those things a week after I told her about how I was struggling with depression due to getting sexually assualted and not telling anyone for months. The reason I hadn't told her sooner was because I didn't want to burden her. She essentially made my worst fear come true by dumping me after I told her that, because she was the first person I told.