How can I get over the shame

I am aware that shame became my identity all these years but especially these days I am ashamed of my life.People have friends,close circles and I don’t.They are starting to get marry for fucks sake and I am just in the beginning of knowing myself. All these years I feel like I am labeled as weird shy loner kid or guy. I was shy and afraid of social interactions. I had my childhood friend group in my neighborhood before I started to highschool but something happened and I was beaten up by my closest friend and shit myself🤡💩. I think nobody know about shitting part but I couldn’t go out for months I was so ashamed and afraid that kids in my neighborhood would see me mock me and intimidate me.This adds big amount of shame to my already shame based identity.Now I don’t know what to do with my life,what job I am gonna choose to secure my life.And all these mfs looks like they figured all out.Meanwhile me desperately hiding myself so nobody can see me. I feel the shame to every bit of my bones.It captured me and I feel so less than. I am afraid of turning into a weird guy when all my efforts are to be normal. I don’t seem to be interested in normal things like working 8-5,insurance,house,relatives etc. I am clueless and shamed.