AITAH for refusing to help my sister with her children, and telling her she chose her shitty life so now she has to deal with it

Hi Reddit. My whole family thinks I’m an asshole, but I disagree. Or maybe think it’s justified.

When my sister (26f) and I (24f) were kids we hated each other. My sister was very hard to get along with, and she never had any friends as a result of this. She’s the type of person who always thinks she’s right, and can never apologize or admit when she’s wrong. As an adult, she still has no friends.

She decided to drink the tradwife coolaide. She met her husband in college, got pregnant, and dropped out. They have four children under the age of 8 together, and the youngest is a quadriplegic due to spinal damage and a birth defect.

I just finished law school, and I’m starting my career. My husband already has an established career, and we’re dinks. We don’t intend on having any children.

My sister has historically talked down to us at family events. She says we don’t even understand what we’re missing out on, we’ll never know what true and unconditional love is, etc. Very condescending, as always.

Lately her and her husband have been fighting. Apparently, per my mother, he has never let her access his income. He gives her cash for groceries. The bills and stuff have always been in his name. Apparently he’s been cheating too. My sister has asked for me to watch her kids on the weekends so she can save up money to be able to ‘evaluate her options.’ AKA leave her husband.

When she came to me and asked this I asked her ‘But isn’t being a traditional wife your calling? You’ve told us this several times. You must’ve forgotten, but traditional wives aren’t supposed to work.’

I kinda laughed at how she explained that maybe being a trad wife isn’t for her after all. Eventually I just shut her down and told her that she picked this life, the life that she has always insisted is so superior to mine. Time to learn to deal with the problems that come with it.

My parents can’t watch her kids because dad is at work on an oil pipeline, and mom is too old to be working the hours she is already working. Our other relatives don’t live close enough to do it. She also asked my parents to move in with them, and my dad shut it down. He can’t really stand her kids.

AITAH?